I Hate Seattle

I found this site tonight, read a few posts, and laughed my tail off. Very funny.

I was in Seattle for 30 years, after moving from the Midwest in my teens. Nothing made sense to me in Seattle. Example: people lie saying, 'I'll meet you at 10 AM,' then never show up. Rude.

I stayed in Seattle until 2010, mostly for work. But then companies such as Microsoft became ridiculous, and it was time to go.

San Francisco is expensive. But at least here, most people don't like each other, but don't make any bones about it.

Oh, and it's warmer and rains half as many days in the year. I wish Seattle nothing but pain in the future. Sorry. Kinda.

Okay, here is a new one. I work for the city. The city pays my mortgage. So in turn, the citizens pay me. Yeah, your taxes pay me. But then again my taxes pay me, pay for your welfare, and pay for your subsidized housing too among the litany of other things. So what?
What I can't stand are the smug self righteous liberal douchebags that like to point that out when things don't go their way. Look at the idiot mayor elected by the idiots. Great choice morons. His qualifications? He was on the board for Sierra Club? Holy shit are you kidding me? Hey maybe we can get someone who isn't an idiot next time? Maybe someone who cares about economic growth, jobs, and crime reduction. The latest this moron hired for police chief is even worse. Cursing is now a crime for cops. WHAT??? We don't have other things we can worry about other than cops dropping f bombs? You assholes in Seattle are gonna get the cops you want and then want the cops you had.
Traffic, city hall, and everything else about this shithole is a joke. I got it...a solution. Let's build a lot more section 8 housing, pile in a shit ton of East Africans, bring in the homeless, and then scratch our heads and wonder why everyone is getting shot, robbed, and burglarized. They suck off the Seattle bleeding heart douchebag nipple and don't provide tax revenue or for that matter, anything redeeming.

Assholes. I'm leaving as soon as I can find a job where SSRLD's don't have the numbers to vote in idiots.

I've lived in Seattle since I graduated from highschool on the eastside (suburbs just don't cut it for me) 10 years ago and it has rendered me a lonely recovering suicidal alcoholic insomniac with severe anxiety issues. I am in general friendly, attractive enough to not be ugly, have a sense of humor, well kept, have interests, hobbies, educated, active, ect, normal guy. I feel for some reason that if I were to move to another city I would not have the constant feeling of misery that has haunted me for the last decade. Everything about this place is misery. Never have I had a friendly neighbor, only the opposite, rude. The general public; rude. Girls; Rude. Guys; well, they don't really qualify as "men" but they aren't boys. One the bus? Rude. At the grocery store? Rude. There are places that I frequent on a daily basis and the employees that see me everyday act as if they have never seen me before everyday. This has happened at multiple places. Baristas? Rude. Eye contact? Nope. Smiles? Nope. Pretty girl walking down the street on a sunny day, maybe I'm in a good mood enough to flash a smile and just say hello? Nope, head down staring at the ground walking very quickly so as not to ever have an interaction with anyone in public. People in cars? bad drivers and full of rage. People on bikes? Entitled assholes who think the world owes it to them to have a clear path at all times. Joggers on crowded sidewalks. People who don't understand 4 way stops. The Stranger? Shitty extreme leftist publication. Save the children people, I cant walk down the street anywhere without wanting to punch someone in the face for making some smart remark to my dress in hopes of getting my attention so they can get some money. I make 12 dollars an hour and I'm trying desperately to move the hell out of here. Pseudo Hippy Communal living types, bad. UW students, it is the stupidest people in the world who think they are the smartest (the extreme leftists again). Homeless youth? I have no more sympathy. I have found a kid sleeping in the dumpster a few times while taking out the recycling, he seemed a little cold, however his facial tattoos didn't seem to be keeping him warm. I have worked in the corporate world, shitty people. I have worked for small indie business, shitty people. Lived on Capital Hill, annoying self righteous hipster gay people. Lived in Fremont, annoying "wacky" people and bros/bro bitches. U District; idiot college kids, rapists, drug dealers and street kids. Greenlake; yuppie fuckers. Want to take the bus? Want to stand in the cold for 15 min. because it is late? Want to be alienated by the psychopaths? Want to be treated like a psychopath because you tried to engage someone in conversation. The women here? Cold, very cold. That is unless you have dated one of their friends or you fall into their very limited range of people they will date if they aren't already in a longterm relationship (everyone, yet no one gets married). The concept of dating here is nonexistent, it is either dedicated partner or whore (extreme leftists). The weather? Chinese water torture, drip drip drip. The general appearance of the place and the people? Schlubby, unkempt, tacky, tasteless, confused.

All of this soul sucking shittyness (and more, I could go on) left me suicidally depressed in the middle of last winter, drinking myself into oblivion nightly in my basement apartment (all I could afford) cutting my arms with whatever sharp thing I could find closest. Fortunately, I am now on the road to recovery. But goddammed if this place isn't the most backward, fucked up, confused, entitled, ignorant, extremist, dorkfest, soggy drag of a town. It reeks of depression, it is a black hole.

I now live in Lake Tahoe and thank god for that. I lived in Seattle for five years. I'm a junior at UW and still need to finish my degree but I'm not sure I can go back to that rain-filled, depressing, passive-aggresive, non-spontaneous city. Seattle is like an ex-boyfriend and I'm bitter about our relationship. I have many friends that, all of whom I love, but guess what? Do we ever, EVER, hang out? No. Because everyone in Seattle has their job, their school, their gym, their little isolated life that we have to navigate daily via bus, car, bike or walking and doing so takes FUCKING forever, so we never hang out. I go to work, school, yoga and then home. Once I'm home I listen to NPR and cook healthy food bought at the farmers market and sit in my clean meditative house and feel smug about what a green, intelligent life I'm leading and then feel depressed cause I want to see friends, but it's piss pouring outside and to drive, or walk, or bus would all suck and my friend lives on top of Fremont hill and I live at the bottom of Wallingford hill. So I sit, smug and depressed and dream of living somewhere sunny where people are bright and interested and available to hang out.

The first question you ask someone you meet in Seattle is "what's your name?" Second question, "Where do you live?" Because if you live in Beacon Hill and I live in Wallingford, let's not even bother talking to each other anymore cause we'll just be bummed that we like each other and know we'll never hang out.

FUCK SEATTLE. I'm not even there anymore, but just like a relationship, once you've moved on you start to realize all the things that drove you crazy, that you let pass you by, because you were blinded by love.

I'm not a blogger. I'm not a reviewer. I was doing research on moving and in my wearisome state, I typed "I hate Seattle".... and here you all are. My people.

So here goes, my official dump:

I hate bumper stickers and the people that advertise their "unique" political thoughts of harmony.

I hate people who spend $50 dollars on a T-shirt that looks $5.00. I hate 50 piercing in someone's face and 20 year olds with $1000 work of tattoos on their bodies.

I hate people who feel they can act "eccentric" because they think they are unique, but really their just fucking crazy. I was the gym and this middle aged women with leg tattoos gets on the elliptical and starts making crazy (I mean CRAZY) faces and swaying her arms all around. It was a real scene and everyone just avoided looking at her.

I hate people who wear jeans and sneakers to the opera.

I hate slamming on my breaks to let a person walk across a main road. I won’t even mention Seattle driving. This is covered pretty well by another member.

I hate Starbucks and their disgusting burnt coffee and commercial branded bullshit. Alternatively, I hate people who find camaraderie through their excessive knowledge about coffee and loyalty to their specific coffee house of choice. This goes for beer and wine, too. Unless you're in the business of selling beer and wine, why on god's earth do you need to know so many useless facts about brands and ingredients. This goes for music, too. I believe I might be defining the "hipster", but these people have dedicated all of their intellectual ability to collect as many useless facts about music, beer, wine, and coffee. Meanwhile, they get paid minimum wage and ride a $1000 bicycle around with their equally retarded friends.

I hate people who care about dogs more than people. What the hell is wrong with you? I don't hate dogs, on the contrary.... but I DON'T appreciate that you want your dog to sniff me and say hello just because I'm walking by you. Keep your dog close to you. Not everyone thinks your little dog is the most amazing thing created.

I hate that the only people who will actually call you when they say turn out to be promoters or salespeople.

I hate being at a party and having my friends embarrassed when I call someone out on bullshit.

I hate listening to pipe dreams with no action. Everyone here has a fucking pipe dream and no action to support it. The only ones who actually make a life for themselves are safe and sound in their little cliques of friends they've known for 20 years. There's no way into that circle. And if you do get invited to a social gathering with these people, they'll be sure to make you feel like an outsider (and if you think you’ve made a friend, they won’t call like they said they would).

I hate people who think working as a waitress/ bartender AND learning about gourmet food puts them in an elite social clique. Who by the way feels defensive if you have college degree and know how to work hard for success. I've been spoken to demandingly by a few of those elite minimum wage earners.

I hate Seattle bicycle hipsters. There are a lot of fucking hills and a lot of fucking rain. Who wants to ride a bike with tiny little tires in this bullshit? I see memorials on street intersections all the time honoring dead hipster bikers.

Being a woman, it's a real pain in the ass to meet quality men. When I do find a man who can hold a conversation and isn't so damn protective, he turns out to be the biggest loser horndog looking to move in my apartment.

I had a date with a guy and he came over to my place, we had a couple drinks, he split a beer on my laptop and was gone to never be seen again. He said he was distraught because his mother’s lesbian girlfriend had died. Only in Seattle.

I went on a date with a doctor (no less) and he wanted to go dutch when it came time to pay. It wasn't even an expensive restaurant. Just a hole in the wall place in Ballard. What gives? The men here don't get it. I really hate them.

Oh, the small town aspect? Ya, I get that when my friends have type casted me into their perception of who I am and then act surprised when I stray out of that perception. If that isn't small town, I don't know what is. For instance, I was friends with a girl and she frequently said, I didn’t know you would like that? I didn't know you wanted to do that? I didn't know you would ever like something like that? We’re not talking about shocking things, here people. It was a matter of movie taste, choice of clothes, or something equally trial. Broaden your mind, people! We're not two dimensional beings!

OH, I especially hate when eating at a restaurant and I get shitty service and want to tip accordingly and my friend argues with me, adds money to my tip and explains to me that waitresses don't make very much money. Hello??? Hello??? Who is forced into a life of waitressing? Anyone? Well, part of waitressing is being nice. No nice = no tip.

I have lived in the Seattle area all my life. Grew up in Auburn and became an adult in Seattle. I thought I was improving my life, but now I can’t see anywhere in Seattle or Washington that I want to be. All I think about is how to get out. When I thought I was improving my life (coming from Auburn, you should understand), I bought a condo here in Capitol here. Now, I'm temporarily stuck. It's not a seller's market, you know.

I'll get out of here.... just you wait! I fucking hate Seattle and all of the Pacific NW for that matter. Grey skies 7 months out of the year. I fucking hate it here.

I moved to Seattle for school, from the mid-atlantic. I plan on leaving when I'm done.

I do hate Seattle because of the weather, but not because of the clouds or rain. I used to live in Pittsburgh. We had plenty of that. I hate the sorry attempt that Seattle makes at actual winter or summer. I hate when people whine about it being 'hot' and 'muggy' when it's 80 degrees with a 50% humidity. Hot? Are you kidding me? Try 95 with 95% humidity. Stop whining. I actually miss hot humid days and not being cold when I go outside in the morning. I miss actually having snow. Eternal fall and spring (and a cold one at that) are not my idea of good weather. Summer here is NOT beautiful. I have to wear a jacket in the summer, what is up with that? Sure, it looks nice outside, but I want it to feel like SUMMER.

Construction, I don't really care about. Maybe they could have better public transit. A light rail would be nice, but it's not terrible as is. Traffic isn't so bad for me, but I don't usually drive during peak hours, so I really don't know. Drivers, though, are quite passive aggressive. Also, pretty dumb. At a traffic circle, you go AROUND counterclockwise to turn left. At a 4-way stop, you wait for the cars that stopped before you. Is that really so hard? If you're a pedestrian, it is unwise to dart into traffic whenever you feel like it. Also dumb: running across the road, and then slowing down when you reach the lane where a car is coming. Yeah, you have a right to cross the road as a pedestrian, but you can also be friendlyand patient and wait for cars to pass. You're not any better than me because you're a pedestrian (or a bicyclist) so stop acting like it. I'll be nice to you, but you need to be nice to me. Don't treat me like a dick just because I'm driving a car.

These really aren't the big things though. I really dislike most of the people. There is a passive-aggressive tendency inherent in the population. Also, people judge others on HUGE stereotypes. For instance, if I say I'm from the east coast, your first response is, "wow, everyone's just so mean there!" If someone says they're from the midwest, the reply might be something like "oh, well I guess you're glad you made it out of there." Seriously, have you been to the East Coast? Yeah, people are mean, if you're stupid! Don't be a dick, and they won't be mean to you! You really think the Midwest is so bad? How much time have you spent there?

People are lumped into stereotypical groups and can't hold opinions and be treated like real human beings. People in Seattle try to drive away others who disagree with them. Just on one of these other posts I saw someone say, "Well, Seattle hates you too." Way to try to be inclusive and understand, asshole. This is why people hate you in the first place. If you disagree with someone in Seattle, they just hate you. If you don't fit in to their 'culture', they hate you. Of course, they don't come right out and tell you. You're just treated ike less of a human being. I've watched this happen to others. Furthermore, people feel like their opinions must be plastered everywhere. Great, you like democrats. Do you see a lot of people disagreeing with you? You're in a city, almost EVERYONE likes democrats. The population of the city doesn't embrace diversity like it wants to. It clings on to race and gender, and doesn't think about diversity of opinion, class, belief. It just talks about issues anyway, and never does anything about them. Most of the people I encounter are homogeneous. They all have the same beliefs, the same political alignments, the same lifestyles. The neighborhoods are mostly the same. Sure, one has a troll, and some a few more hipsters than the others. But, I have no need to go to a 20 different farmer's markets. They're all the same. Haven't you seen a farmer's market? Yeah, it's great, but, it's just a farmer's market! What is wrong with you? I don't care about another independent book shop or independent coffee shop. Are they really all that different? It's coffee and books, for crying out loud!

What does it say about the city when the two most popular attractions are an observation tower that isn't all that tall and a farmer's market? Where's the history? Where's the ACTUAL culture? People are too busy cherishing 'culture' and trying to be 'creative' and 'independent' themselves that they end up not embracing a culture that may have already existed. Seattle now has little culture, and people just keep trying to force it. The culture it does have is entirely homogeneous, exclusive, and passive aggressive. Really, people aren't all that much smarter here either. Yeah, there are some smart people (as you get anywhere), but most people go around espousing some new found facts that they just read from some sensational book. Great, you can read. Now, stop trying to tell me how stupid I am, and start actually discussing something, you pretentious ass. If you had one semblance of original thought then I might actually think that you're smart. If you were willing to think about an idea rather than just assume its correctness because you happened to read it somewhere, I might actually think you're smart.

Unfortunately, Seattle ends up being a city full of people who want it to be great, and keep pushing in the wrong directions. Some people genuinely love it. Good for them, I hope they enjoy it. Others do not. I am included in that lot.