Had to Say Something
At best, Seattle is the most cold, dark, depressing, low-energy place I’ve been in the Untitled States. At worst, it is the most sociopathic, passively hostile place I’ve ever had to live.
There is a complete lack of light. Instead there is dark, cold constant drizzle. Offices empty out on a sunny day because it is such a rare event, then people talk about what a great day it was while it constantly drizzles for the next six days. If there are three straight days in a row of sun people start saying things like, “we sure need some moisture.” And that’s in the summer. In the winter it constantly drizzles in the gray darkness for WEEKS. Summer consists of 5 or 6 weekends of tepid filtered sun through haze. It is rare there are two sunny weekend days in a row in the summer. (Sorry folks, one sunny day and one “partly cloudy” day does not count.) By the way, partly cloudy is a completely different definition here than the rest of the country. Partly cloudy in the summer does not mean high thin clouds with lots of light still coming through, or sun followed by afternoon showers. It means dark, low thick clouds ALL DAY that make everything dark and depressing. There may be occasional “sun breaks” where the sun shines for a few minutes or even a few hours on your patch of ground. Those are still considered “really nice” summer days by locals. Honestly, waiting for days on end for that rare clear day just to say “oh the mountain is out” is not worth it.
Case in point: It is rare to see a house here built with air conditioning. For those of you from the rest of the country, that should be enough proof on its own of how NOT hot it gets here in the “summer.” Think about it. Seattle is at a higher latitude than Maine, but with a constant on shore flow of clouds off the Pacific. If it wasn’t for the few Olympic mountains to the west (which get 120 inches of rain per year) shading Seattle, then Seattle would be a complete mud pit.
I have to constantly apply moss killer to my ROOF. The ROOF in direct line to the sun doesn’t get enough sun to keep the moss killed off! Again, for people from the rest of the country I doubt if you can imagine this. I thatched several large yard containers of moss out of my lawn this summer. Constant application of moss killer and lime doesn’t seem to faze it.
Boats sit mostly unused here. A friend of mine bought a boat. The first year he used it 10 times. The second year he used it 5 times, the third year he used it once. The last five years it hasn’t moved at all. Boating in sucky weather simply is not a good time.
“There is so much to do” if you can add “in a 45-degree drizzle” to your outdoor activity. Here, try a few and see if you still want to come here. “I love biking – in a 45 degree drizzle.” “I love barbecuing in the backyard with friends – in a 45 degree drizzle.” “I love wake boarding – in a 45 degree drizzle.” “I love hiking – in a 45 degree drizzle.” Are you starting to get the picture? Yes there are MANY outdoor activities here, but you better love doing them in dark, crappy weather.
Good luck growing any garden vegetables that require a lot of sun like tomatoes, corn, etc.
Seattle is claustrophobic.
Seattleites have a fetish for planting vegetation in front of everything. For example, the Safeway near my house you can’t see the tiny sign until you are past it because there are so many bushes planted in front of it. How many times have you completely missed freeway onramp signs because there is so much wild vegetation growing over it?
Some acquaintances of mine have shades that open from the top down, so you can let in light, but so you can’t see out into the yard. Then they wonder how their car gets stolen right in front of their house repeatedly. Neither they nor any of the neighbors can see out of their windows! Even if they were to open the shades from the bottom up, there are trees and shrubs planted in front of their windows. It is like people want to retreat to their murky huts in the trees and try to pretend there aren’t 1.5 million people living all around them.
Then there are the trees and vegetation planted next to sidewalks constantly slapping you in the knees or in the face. I’m so sick of getting accosted by vegetation every time I try to walk down a sidewalk. Greenery is OK, but there is a complete lack of concept of keeping it groomed here. Everyone in my neighborhood walks in the street because the sidewalk is mostly impassible.
It is NOT that beautiful here. Everyone says it is “so green” but that is because all the major vegetation here is evergreen trees people! The broad leaf trees here look sick, yellowish, and water logged. And the sky is a constant monotone dark gray.
Seattle has a complete lack of concept of community, common decency, and friendliness. People are more worried about trees and exercising outdoors than building relationships with other people. People here tend to spend a lot of their time with their outdoor exercise groups. Still, most folks never seem to form relationships from it. I have observed many times people stomping scowl-faced single file on mountain trials, pedaling hard single file down the road on bikes, etc., but nobody is talking to each other. If you greet someone on a trail, be prepared to be completely ignored 90% of the time, same as if you greet someone anywhere in Seattle for that matter. The neighborhood backyard barbecue is completely non-existent. Partly because you can never predict when there will be weather good enough to have one, and partly because it would never occur to people to have friends over for a barbecue. That would be considered “lame.” For some reason gathering at people’s houses is out of fad. It is expected that you will get together and do some extreme outdoor sport, making sure to have the right amount of expensive synthetic layers, and wearing the proper scowl on your faces. Nobody will speak during the exercise, but afterwards everyone will all say how great it was.
I love to cook great meals for people. I used to host epic dinner parties almost every weekend in the summer before I moved here. When I moved here I tried to get people together I met at work. What a waste. About half the people that say they are coming will not show up, or will show up 2 hours late. Once when the people that were supposed to bring salad showed up after the dinner was cleared, then got defensive when I asked if they had trouble on the way, I simply stopped inviting people over. Now I have a beautiful kitchen that sits empty. Nobody invites me over, or anyone else for that matter.
I have tried groups like Space City Mixers, meetup.com, etc. with little success. Rarely these events can be fun, but usually people seem aloof and unfriendly, or if they are seemingly normal you only see them once. It takes years before people open up here, if at all, even people you work closely with. If you do go to a social event, you won’t get through an evening without people angrily stating their political views as if everyone in the room agrees with them. Don’t dare share a different point of view, or if you do, be prepared for heated glares the rest of the night. There is no friendly debate here. It is always personal.
Look at people in other cars while driving. At best they look sad and depressed, at worst they are wearing the same angry scowl they do while hiking. You rarely see anyone with a contented look, much less a smile.
All my friends are from someplace else. We bond together easily because we are the ones looking around for relationships. We are the ones glancing around with puzzled faces like, “what is wrong with everyone here?” Most of the entrenched folks “don’t have time” to be friendly, or “have all the friends they need.” I submit it takes the same amount of time to smile as it does to frown.
Why am I still here? The one good thing about Seattle is it is a great place to work. I’m apparently am overpaid for my position. I’ve interviewed repeatedly in other cities such as San Diego, Los Angeles, Denver and Chicago, but none of them will match my current salary (adjusted to the cost of living in each city). Every year I promise myself I will sell my house and leave. But then I get a great new project, my house value decreases, I get no job offers that come close to my current salary, and I spend another lonely year at my great job. I accept it is completely my fault that I am still here. But, if I can help someone else avoid this place if it isn’t right for them, then that will make me smile.
Over the last seven years of being treated like a leper by the average Seattleite, I find myself becoming bitter, angry, and defensive, just like most of the people I complain about. I find myself not returning phone calls to family and friends. I find myself showing up to the rare birthday party or social gatherings late and loathing the time I have to spend there, mostly because the people are so unpleasant and socially inept. In short, the attitudes here will infect you if you stay too many years. You will start to believe it is OK not to acknowledge others. You will start to believe it is normal not to chat with your neighbors. You will start to believe that if you did leave Seattle, it would take years to replace the two or three good friends you have here. And so you stay, telling yourself that you will leave as soon as this project is over, as soon as the kids reach X grade, as soon as your house value gets to X dollars, etc. And one day you wake up and realize you have wasted several years in one of the most horrid, inhospitable places in the US.