how do i loathe thee
I am so glad i found this site! When i try to think of anything nice to say about Seattle nothing comes to mind. I lived on Crapitol Hill for too long maybe, or spent too much time trying to understand people, but one way or another found myself feeling a certain sense of dread in my daily routine. I am not gonna lie, i loved this place. I grew up here and was so sad when my parents decided to move to the burbs so i did what anyone would do when they moved outta the rents house. I moved to the city. I can tell you countless stories of terrible happenings and horrible self serving assholes that would blow your mind.
1. The Gay Scene.
I've never met so many unsure, selfish, ignorant assholes in my life. so your gay huh? well i dunno what you want me to do about it, pat ya on the back? Don't get me wrong, there are some awesome gays in Seattle, but 49 outta 50 will fuck you, your neighbor, your best friend, your brother, your boss, and then lie about it until they fuck you again. whatever they can use you for (especially social standing) they will. most of the gays I'm talking about are the ironic hipsters and not just the dudes, HOLY SHIT! the lesbians are outta fucking control. never have i seen a less appealing group of lesbians. if you don't like their music, they hate you. if you don't do coke, they hate you. if you KNOW they do coke, they hate you. if you make a joke about lesbians even if you are a lesbian(I'm not a lesbian btw), they hate you. touchy touchy ladies, lay off the blow. I almost got beat up by one of these coked out ladies of leisure at my work when she was dating my boss, as my boss stood by and did nothing. this was all over a lesbian joke i made in a kinda 'joke off' with my boss that was all in good fun. aren't we gays suppose to stick together? I dated a guy for a split second who in the short time we were together cheated with at least three other people that i know of and blamed it on the pressure in the "scene" he was involved in... seriously? i can go on for days about the gay scene, so lets move on.
2.passive aggressive.
"hey, can i ask you something?" "yeah what's up?" "well... someone told me that you said some pretty awful things about me and i thought we were friends" " who told you that?!" well Steven said that Frank told him that he heard it from Sarah who said she heard it from Angie who said she heard it from Phil who said he heard it from Kyle who told him what you said." "I never said anything to Kyle!"
really? haha. this is based on fact. i can teach you a lesson of how to deal with this crazy, mutated, enlarged breed of passive aggressiveness. Kill them with kindness, it irritates them as much as their bull shit kills any sane person. in a normal world i would simply say confront them and you could normally meet somewhere in the middle with some kind of understanding, but not in this case. its seriously baffling.
3. Art/Music Scene.
well theres no art scene. I mean, theres art in Seattle... somewhere... right? I'm kidding of course, i have met a few people who actually know something about art and create things that are better then little monsters eating cupcakes in a spaceship with hearts in the air to suggest their love of cupcakes.
Theres been some good music to come outta Seattle as well, but have you ever spoken to any of these people? yeeeeaaahhh... leaves something to be desired, and with a quick trip to any of the several buy, sell, trade record stores in the area you can undoubtedly recover from that purchase you don't want to admit to ever making. Have you ever noticed how many musicians skip Seattle in their tours? and we've all noticed how smart Courtney is... so as for a music scene in Seattle? i think it died in 94.
I have read some things about how people walk around like zombies, bumping into you without even an excuse me... I'm not quite sure what that is all about. I have been in situations like one I've read on here, walking home with groceries and somehow got in the way of someone walking while moving to the entire other side of the sidewalk to get outta their way just to have them move back into my path, trying to do something considerate only makes you an asshole apparently.
I've held doors for people as well, and it seems as though i may be the antichrist for being kind or thoughtful, i eventually starting saying thank you to myself for these self serving douche bags.
But still one of the best things is when your working somewhere and you offer help to a customer and the customer looks at you like you just saved their mother from drowning in lava while simultaneously curing cancer and reciting the most beautiful sonnet they've ever heard. It's hilarious how shocking it seems to people when you offer to help them, makes you question them and any other place they may frequent...
Most of these things are meant to be read in a humorous manner, but it doesnt take away from the truth of them. i think finding the humor in these things is what helped me get through everyday. the only downside is having to do it alone, but hey, thats why I'm so glad i found this site.