I Hate Seattle

Physically, I've moved on, but I honestly believe that the emotional stain of growing up here will take a while to rid myself of, which is why I appreciate this site, as a sort of therepeutic outlet.

You know, on election night, as drunken frat boys ran bellowing through the streets about impending change, I sat huddled in a corner-- it was wet and raining-- sharing cigarettes with a homeless American Indian. These same people who espouse compassion wouldn't even look at him, and when they did, it was with disgust.

I remember a time working at a grocery store and a severely scarred and disfigured burn victim came to my line-- she had stumps for fingers and badly needed assistance setting her apples on the counter. Her hands oozed with some sort of fluid. I helped her. I observed how people literally recoiled and grimaced in her presence. I gave her the dignity, which is what we all deserve, of genuine conversation, and I found it to be personally fulfilling, to learn of her own life: where she was from, her educational pursuits, her family, her name, her interests. This wasn't some philanthropic endeavor on my part. This was adhering to the notion of judging people not by the color of their skin (or their physicality, in essence), but rather the content of their character. Hers was a good soul.

These same people who petition to rename King County as "Martin Luther King County" scoffed and rolled their eyes because I was taking up minutes of their precious time. When she left, tears streamed down my face for both admiration of her courage and rage toward the disregard and humiliation that she must frequently endure. The next person in line snapped his fingers at me to hurry up.
Seattle, what a terrible place to be different, disadvantaged, disfigured, or disillusioned.

These people genuinely don't give a fuck about anything other than their own sense of convenience and leisurely comfort. A nicely insulated lot, too. Hardship is something they know about from King 5 News, and if it upsets their appetites, they turn off the television and finish their lavish organic meals.

Speaking of the school system, I went to Catholic school as a boy. My mother objected to the public schools, and wanted a good education for us. I was the poor kid on food stamps with holes in my corduroy trousers and a perceived whore for a mother because she was young, divorced and single, attractive and... had a nose-ring. We (my sister, mother and I) were persecuted for it, by parents, teachers and students alike. The students ridiculed my sister and I; the parents and teachers spread malicious gossip about my mother--all she was doing was going to school to better her situation and working as a waitress to support us. And then we'd sit next to them at mass every Sunday, where they would absolve themselves of their sins while snickering at us in between religious utterances.

Seattle, what a terrible place to be different.

I was formerly a "lifelong" resident of Seattle until I recently got the fuck out of that miserable pisshole, and detest it beyond description. Whether it is the earth-saving, SUV-driving soccer moms, the bumper-sticker "Save Darfur" activists, the would-be quasi-spiritual hippies with their flannel, smug expressions exaggerated by vaginal-looking facial hair, the latte liberals, the pseudo-intellectual dipshits of the University District, the absolute dearth of racial diversity (Seattle is the most racially homogenized city with a population over 500,000 in the United States- 75% white, almost all of whom are German-Norwegian descended; dare I say a degenerative mix of), the lack of ethnic food save for two-star Asian restaurants and Gyro stands, the unspoken contempt for fellow man, the despicably antisocial behavior, the pervasive passive aggression, the big-dicked obsession with authority and the enforcement of the pettiest of laws, the insincerity, the sexual dysfunction, the aloof, "I Am Bitch" women who despise attractive men and stimulate themselves only with the dildos attached to their bicycle seats, the dormant restaurants on a Saturday night, the fact that the municipality lacks tenable public transportation whilst trying to consider itself a bastion of progressivism--I really don't know. The fact that there is nothing to do other than stay inside and watch movies that you rented from some jack-off at Scarecrow. The city shuts down BEFORE DUSK. I just fucking hate the place. Seattle residents adore the smell of their own flatulence, for that matter. This is a city that has seen its best days (The early 90's). And what amuses me most are those ignorant, arrogant fools who deem Seattle: A. A world class city, which it is most certainly not, and
B. The Mecca of the Pacific Northwest (Drive two hours north to Vancouver for some real class and sophistication).

An anecdote: I grew up on Phinney Avenue in Fremont. The neighborhood had character during the days of my youth-- brick houses, rentals with crusting paint and unkempt lawns, the backyard where my sister and I would pluck plumbs and fight over who got to sit in the tree, dudes with freshly-brewed coffee in hands standing out in the street outside of Lighthouse Roasters on a Monday morning playing hacky sack while the neighborhood cats sauntered about. The days when Gary Payton lobbed alley-oops to the Reign Man, "Big Smooth" hit three-pointers with grace and ease; you could hear the whites AND blacks roaring TOGETHER downtown; Griffey slamming bombs inside the Kingdome while Lou Piniella tore up home plates and hurled them in rage. The neighborhood changed drastically for the worse after 2000, when the rentals were sold and turned into duplexes, the lawns were removed, the cats got locked up inside 1-bedroom apartments, and the Range Rovers began lining the streets. This city has lost its character, become corporatized, gentrified; the ghosts of my fabled memories still walk the same streets where I used to pick blackberries while the "Fat Lady" would scream at me from her basement level apartment.

This "town" is dead to me. Gone. Lost. Unsalvageable.

FUCK SEATTLE.